ONLY COMMIES SEND SPAM... AND WE AREN'T COMMIES

"When I ordered this shirt I was pretty stoked. I imagined the shirt would be cool and comfy. But when I received it in the mail I was blown away - figuratively and literally. Rays of red, white, and blue poured forth from the package as I opened it and...
Let's get nostalgic for a moment and remember a time in history when the world was great. America's economy was strong and the US Commander in Chief was man's man Bill Clinton. Get Big Willy style in this printed tank top depicting all the things we loved about 1990s. Owners...
"Just when I thought Dubya couldn't get any more American, now I get to see him skydiving while riding a shark every time I look in the mirror. Every. Time. Yes, that means I wear it more than I should in order for it to remain clean and yes, it...
"While I purchased this shirt with an understanding that I am misrepresenting the historical events of the Cold War and the tools used by President Ronald Reagan to confront the Soviet Union, I was not entirely prepared for the full extent of glory and status that was to be bestowed...
"This shirt is the reason the constitution was written. Now that I have it, the flag waves more gallantly, the stars in the evening sky are brighter, and eagles fly faster than before. Once I laid eyes on this shirt, it was obvious that mother freedom would backhand the tar...
It's Trump in his prime.  1990's style, baby!
"Upon opening the package I received a sense of patriotic pride that overwhelmed me with a sense of truth to the awe-inspiring historical significance that this gun toting, bear riding, Emancipation Proclamation writing, American represented to all who are free!!!"
"T-Rex, Trump, and the T-birds!? Nothing more patriotic than this shirt! When I put it in I feel like a screaming bald Eagle, ready to pluck the designer dogs out of the hands of the Hollywood liberals purses and man bags and drop them from a thousand feet into the...
"This shirt changed my life. As I unboxed my package and saw my shirt, I decided to put it on. The second I put this shirt on I felt courageous for the first time in my life... There was a slight tingling sensation that shot through my body like an m1...
When you're America's most powerful business man, a typical mechanical private jet just won't do. Trump has used his negotiation skills and charming personality to tame the wild bald eagle for his personal transportation. Enjoy the breeze from the eagle's flapping wings on your biceps and underarms in this patriotic...
"I used to be a lactose intolerant vegan on a gluten free diet, just like many of you. I spent my days at my parents house, writing on my blog about how Hillary would be the best choice for president. Then I stumbled across this tank top and my life...
America's most famous political cowboy has conquered a new frontier. Teddy T-Rex can ride anything -- even the most ferocious predator from the Jurassic era.

AMERICAN AF ON INSTAGRAM

ONLY COMMIES SEND SPAM... AND WE AREN'T COMMIES

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