• EVERY DAY IS INDEPENDENCE DAY WHEN YOU’RE AMERICAN AF!

ONLY COMMIES SEND SPAM... AND WE AREN'T COMMIES

"When I opened the package, I was literally in tears. This great country of ours is represented perfectly in this Tank Top. My love for American and now this Tank Top is strong as the Mississippi current. Abraham Lincoln, the most beautiful man to have lived, sportin' Sun Glasses because...
Attention, any Country who successfully lands people on the Moon. First off, we'd like to welcome you. You're about 50 years too late, but that's beside the point. Take a look around, snap some photos, then get back into your craft and move along. I hear the weather in Mars...
"Since buying this shirt: I have been invited to sing national anthems at baseball games. People have stopped treading on me. Women address me as Mr. Theodore Abraham Washington, the LXIX before throwing themselves at my feet (which generally hover above the ground). I can drink 16 oz of Budweiser...
You know, I really wanted to give this t-shirt a funny, witty description. But I'm just straight outta F's to give. I couldn't give less F's except if I didn't even bother typing this. If you're like me, this shirt's for you.
"This shirt changed my life. As I unboxed my package and saw my shirt, I decided to put it on. The second I put this shirt on I felt courageous for the first time in my life... There was a slight tingling sensation that shot through my body like an m1...
Except for all those hot foreign babes...let 'em in!!!!!  Warning: some people WILL hate you for wearing this.  But, you give 0 f*cks.
You long to see, touch and caress them. You want to hear them purr. Tell her in this "Show me Your Kitties" t-shirt. Then tell her you'd like to see her cat too. The last four sentences were meant for entertainment purposes only. We are not responsible for injuries (emotional...
Merica is about freedom. This shirt screams Freedom like an eagle soaring over purple mountain majesties. Don't forget about the tank top version of this. The guys and gals who pulled the tank shirt from the bosom of Mt. Rushmore went a step up and decided that they'd make this...
Do your muscles scream assault weapons?  PROS:* Quality-made: it fits just like it should, and although I'm not certain, I'm pretty sure that I'm now bullet-proof. * The artwork is mesmerizing. When I walk into a room, everyone's gaze is drawn to my bosom and I'm not even a chick!*I've...
"Before I ordered this shirt, I benched 225. Now, I can lift the souls of millions of oppressed peoples across the globe, bringing the almighty American might of the Bald Eagle to every foreign man, woman, and child. Makes me want to sling an M-60 across my back and liberate...
Read my shirt....Operators are standing by, waiting to set you up with a one way ticket off of The Greatest Nation on Earth. I'm so sorry that your kid had endure the hardship of listening to the Pledge of Allegiance for 20 seconds this morning. Please accept my deepest apologies.....YA...
The writing on the skull means INFIDEL in Arabic.
Like the snake says, "Don't Jihad On Me!". Try to, and it's not going to end up well for you. It's going to ugly, and that's that.
The Middle Finger coupled with the Red, White, and Blue.......Two symbols universally recognized around the globe. Put them together on this shirt, and they make a powerful statement. This particular one is all for you ISIS.
"This shirt came out of the box and I was immediately 200% more 'Murica! After 14 years in the Army I thought I was pretty patriotic, but I immediately got a freedom erection (Freerection) which- no lie- became an Army Ranger and hunted down a terrorist cell all on its...
When you hear "For English, Press 1; Para Espanol, Oprima Numero Dos".
  Like it says on your t-shirt.... "Texan AF".....and you wouldn't have it any other way
Are you hot, happy and Texan as f*ck? Whether it be the cowboy boots, Longhorns football or The Alamo, you’ve got all the reason in the world to consider yourself cut from the finest American cloth—buy this shirt, and let the other 49 states know where you stand!
If you have a way with words, a passion for puzzles, a love for riddles, and a fondness for talking like a sailor anytime you speak of Hillary Clinton, then shirt is just the right fit. Much like the riddle printed on your Lonestar beer cap, this one is a...
1918. 1945. 20?? We've already got two world war championships -- don't make us pull a Pat Riley and three-peat. Merica.  
"This shirt changed my life. As I unboxed my package and saw my shirt, I decided to put it on. The second I put this shirt on I felt courageous for the first time in my life... There was a slight tingling sensation that shot through my body like an...
  Everybody’s got that one buddy who’s crazier than a snake’s armpit. Even more maddening, with beer in his belly, destruction of property, public embarrassment and long-lasting memories are bound to take place—there’s nothing better. However, no matter how wild and crazy he might get, there’s one patriot who can...
  A classic gray t-shirt for the patriotic man. This "Proud 17" tee worn together with your woman's "American 76" will show you're a patriotic couple. Just make sure that you walk on the right side of one another.
Because you're from a country of champions, and everyone should know it. Don't make us 3-peat!
AMERICAN AF ON INSTAGRAM

ONLY COMMIES SEND SPAM... AND WE AREN'T COMMIES

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