24
I bought Shake. My brother bought Bake. As soon as we received our shirts, we opened the box and a bald eagle with a mullet flew out at top speed. We took this as a good omen. As we tried on our new Shake & Bake shirts, we felt the...
26
I bought Shake for myself, and Bake for my grandson. That little pecker never looked happier in his whole life. When he saw me wearing Shake, and went to change into & Bake, he had been wearing some stupid shirt with a lesbian named Justin Bieber on it. That move...
69
Grab your wingman and keep up with foreign relations the American way: putting warheads on foreheads.
2
I swear this shirt makes my bulge look bigger. Like its great powers of badassery increased my dick size by 6 inches. But that’s not all - not by a long shot. I can now shoot a squirrel from a half-mile away, and a butterfly from a quarter-mile. Those motherf***in...
442
"When I ordered this shirt I was pretty stoked. I imagined the shirt would be cool and comfy. But when I received it in the mail I was blown away - figuratively and literally. Rays of red, white, and blue poured forth from the package as I opened it and...
72
"This shirt is the reason the constitution was written. Now that I have it, the flag waves more gallantly, the stars in the evening sky are brighter, and eagles fly faster than before. Once I laid eyes on this shirt, it was obvious that mother freedom would backhand the tar...
8
In our future post-apocalyptic world, you’ve got to have a good supply of shirts to help you blend in. This FDR tank will be perfect. It will melt into the surrounding devastation, AND it will help show off my f***ing awesome biceps, which will no doubt triple in size. It...
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