ONLY COMMIES SEND SPAM... AND WE AREN'T COMMIES

332 reviews
"This shirt was everything it said it was. It's pure America. Not only is the quality well and it fit good. It also gives a feeling of true American Bad Assery when you wear it. It can be described as flying on an American Bald Eagle as it shoots fucking...
168 reviews
"You know how in the movies when someone unsheathes a sword you hear the "shwing" sound it makes? Putting this tank top on, you hear the battle cry of a bald eagle taking down a tea-drinking tyrant. Merica."
11 reviews
"I purchased this shirt because I love America, bald eagles, and mullets. However, unbeknownst to me, when I put it on I mentally transform into a robosoldier capable of bringing security and justice to those in need. I feel the need to help the elderly and read to small children....
14 reviews
Do you wake up to the sounds of screamin' eagles every morning to salute the beautiful red, white, and blue of Old Glory? Is your ring tone the Star Spangled Banner? Then you're American AF -- and you need this shirt.
15 reviews
"This shirt gives you a raging freedom boner and pisses of commie scum simultaneously. The best part is your freedom boner is so huge you've already got a tool to beat the commies up and send them home with a concussion provided by some Grade A USDA approved beef. They'll...
9 reviews
Cheap labor, knock-off handbags and political corruption—it’s the world’s trash, and it’s exactly the the kind of thing Capitol Eagle keeps from crossing into American territory! And don’t try any funny business—perched atop Capitol Hill, Capitol Eagle sees your every move …
12 reviews
The official mascot of freedom wants you to proudly display those rock hard guns. Superimposed over old glory, this eagle is serious- serious about freedom and gun shows. The hardcore detailing makes it look like the eagle is real. He's real ready to strike at non-gun flaunting, freedom haters.
4 reviews
Serving as America’s national bird, the bald eagle has already done more than enough to earn the respect of patriots everywhere. Following in Neil Armstrong’s steps, however, the bird will soar to new heights, checking intergalactic travel off of its to-do list. So, if muscular enough to show off your...
4 reviews
For most middle-aged men with hairlines retreating faster than the French army, feelings of shame, despair and anguish begin to set in. Fortunately, as America’s official emblem, the bald eagle summons emotions of a more confident, stalwart nature. Yes, the head of a bald eagle looks like a cue ball,...
5 reviews
“Immediately when i put it on i felt like the urine in my bladder was transformed into the water from the delaware from the exact same night george washington crossed it to wish merry christmas to the british.”

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ONLY COMMIES SEND SPAM... AND WE AREN'T COMMIES

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